“Another Life Sentence”

February 18, 2018 – 7:57 a.m. – Another Sunday without Margaret

Owing to the history of my multiple marriages, that I’ve spent forty years of my life in varying states of wedded bliss. Some of that bliss was dependent on ignorance. Learning to ignore or manage emotional responses to the little things that annoy is a skill developed ostensibly to preserve domestic tranquility. I would advise you to argue, instead. Argue as fervently as necessary to arrive at the truth. That truth may be that those little things are impossible to change, or that your behavior must change to allow for them. But shine the light on those little things anyway. Perhaps in the heat and the glare, they will shrivel just a bit.

In this next “Life Sentence,” I’ll be more careful with my considerations, more observant of the lessons I should have learned along the way. I’m only 59 as I write this and still married. This divorce should be final by early June. There is almost nothing I must do to kill off any thoughts of romance at this juncture. Why my heart was pounding harder as I wrote that last line is worthy of some attention. Is it rage, or that feeling of being broken, causing my blood pressure to rise?

I’m guessing I have at least one more (20-year) life sentence left in me, maybe two.

Enough for now, this will have to do.

This may be another of the, “Modified over Time” posts that should be updated on a regular basis. So, I’ll add the date below the header to note the first entry.